Women have turned to Reddit to reveal their worst “nice guy” experiences and, well, let’s just say they’re dark as hell. But you already knew that. “I rejected this one guy because he really creeped me out and he proceded [sic] to stalk me until I managed to get a restraining order,” one user shared. “He also would send really creepy gifts to my house and one of the gifts was a heart shaped box with a dead squirrel inside, I was terrified of him.” Read on below.
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User “George-bonanza.” “I’m a barista. I had a regular ask me out a while back. He’s kind of a creepy guy who has a reputation for being a ‘starer’ and likes to try to make small talk with the women there even when they’re obviously busy doing their f*cking jobs. I try to avoid talking to him as much as I can but he seems mostly harmless.
When I rejected him, he went on this tirade about how all women are shallow and I only turned him down because he’s fat. Note that I’m engaged and wear a ring, so he was barking up the wrong tree in the first place. I basically told him that he was the shallow one because he only asked me out because he thinks I’m pretty, given that I’m not even nice to him. Shut him up.”
User “dictatorAngel.” ““The worst ‘Nice Guys’ are the ones who don’t give up. It’s one thing to turn someone down and have them back off, but I’ve had some people who refuse to give up. I think a lot assume that they will eventually win you over like some kind of rom com but it’s usually just creepy.
A guy who lived in my dorm my freshman year of college professed that he loved me one day because it was killing him seeing me get close with another one of our friends. I let him down but he continued to pursue me for the next 6 months. He wrote me poems and would play me songs that reminded him of me, and would tell me I’m beautiful and perfect in Italian (a language we share) when other people were present. He even told me that he didn’t know if he could live without me and kind of threatened to harm himself if we didn’t date.
Even when I started dating someone else this behavior continued until he decided there was another girl he was in love with. It gets kind of scary when people confuse obsession for love.”
User “Ushouldknowthat.” “My kids were all best friends w/a neighbors kids who were the exact same ages. Their dad and I hung out since we were both stay at home parents. One day he asks me if I want to see a photo he took. I’m all ‘sure’, thinking it was a funny kid shot or whatever.
It’s a f*cking d*ck pic. His f*cking d*ck.”
User “opxum” (part I). “I’ve had multiple run ins with Nice Guys but one that really stands out to me happened when I was in my early teens.
I started talking to him because his seat was across from mines in class, and he was easy to talk to. After about a week, he sent me multiple long Facebook poems about how I’m the most beautiful Asian girl he’s ever met, and how meeting me has changed his life. Not through a PM – but posted on my wall. At the time, I knew that shit was wrong on multiple levels but didn’t really know WHY, so I kind of ignored how creepy it was altogether.”
User “opxum” (part II). “I shot him a PM and told him in the best way I could that I didn’t feel that way about him, but I thought the poems were lovely and appreciated it. He flipped out on me, accusing me of using him and leading him on which actually guilted me into going on a date with him because I really did feel awful. The date was awkward, I couldn’t get into it, or him. We barely talked and he would barely even look me in the eye!
I told him the same night I didn’t think we could be more than friends and… the next day he spread rumours about how I sucked his d*ck on the date. When I STILL wouldn’t date him after those rumours had spread, he basically went on a Facebook rampage about how women are sluts that pass on nice guys like him constantly.
Yeah. Fun times.”
User “caliconmonster” (part I). “I met this guy online who offered to help me learn his native language. Every day I would send him journal entries and he would correct them for me. I offered to help him as well but he said just chatting with me in english helped enough.
A few weeks into this he says he is going to visit the city that I live in and says we should meet. I tell him Id rather we didnt because I have a boyfriend (which I had already mentioned many times) and I think he might be looking for a date. He insists that he only wants to meet as friends, but I tell him I am busy.”
User “caliconmonster” (part II). “Then suddenly he calls me saying he has arrived and has brought some american chips for me (I had mentioned before that I really missed american chips). I agree to meet him for coffee, to find that he has bought me TONS of gifts, including wine and wine glasses. I politely reject the gifts but he insists that I must take them because his arms are sore from carrying them. I quickly have coffee with him during which he tells me he must marry a white girl because the girls in his country are all shallow, and he wants his children to be powerful and being half white would make them more powerful. I am a white girl. I make an excuse to leave because I am uncomfortable.
I text him to tell him that I dont think we should be friends anymore because I think he is looking for more and it makes me uncomfortable. He immediately threatens to hurt my family members, of whom he has the names of on facebook. He also reminds me that he knows where I go to school. Terrified, I block him on all platforms. Four years later and he still makes attempts to contact me via his mom and brother’s cell numbers.”
User “ratchnad” (part I). “I had a class with a guy. We worked on a project together in my first year of uni, and he confided in me about some of his issues and I felt really bad for him.
He sat beside me in class and started messaging me every day, and it was honestly exhausting. I told him I had issues of my own so I wasn’t the best person to talk to, and he should seek out a counsellor, etc.
Over the next few years he started coming up to me more in person in common areas of the campus. I’d politely tell him I had stuff to do and I’d rather work alone, so he’d sit beside me silently until I’d leave. I found him following me around campus on multiple occasions too. I started to realize I should probably limit messaging him back even if it was to tell him ‘leave me alone’ so I wasn’t giving him something to hold on to. So, I started outright ignoring his daily hellos as much as it made me feel bad.”
User “ratchnad” (part II). “About a year later in the year 4 class we took together he kept turning around and staring at me I swear every 30 seconds. He did it so much that other people in the class started asking me about it. Then one day we were supposed to get up and pitch an idea for a video. He gets up there, pitches his idea then PULLS UP AN IMAGE OF MY FACE and says ‘I want ratchnad to play the lead part’ as he clicks through a couple more slides of pictures of me stolen off Facebook.
I was mortified. I’m a very quiet and shy student so I had no idea what to do, I just slunk down in my seat and prayed no one looked at me. After that a good guy friend of mine talked to the guy and told him how uncomfortable he was making me. He seemed to get the message after that- probably because it was another guy saying it.”
User “ratchnad” (part III). “He never got outright aggressive but his behaviour was definitely upsetting to me. I even started to get scared he was following me home so I never listened to music on the bus or on my walk. I did on multiple instances tell him that I didn’t want to talk, he was making me uncomfortable, I had a boyfriend etc. but I should have just been mean to send a clear message. I definitely could have handled it better, but I didn’t want to be rude to him because he was clearly troubled.”
User “alwaysonthatokiedokie.” “He picked me up and took me to the beach to get me out of my head and not be alone with myself after my friend committed suicide. But I turned away to stare out at the ocean and he came up behind me and started grinding on me. I told him to stop and wanted to go home as this was just making my mood worse now. Get to my house he gets out for a hug goodbye and immediately pulls my face up to his and tries to full on make out with me. Thanks for ruining a kind gesture with the assumption of getting laid when I am grieving my friend’s death.”
User “Naptaker1.” “I rejected this one guy because he really creeped me out and he proceded to stalk me until I managed to get a restraining order. He also would send really creepy gifts to my house and one of the gifts was a heart shaped box with a dead squirrel inside, I was terrified of him.”
User “petshopboi.” “This guy on Tinder asked for nudes, I said no and asked him if this tactic he used to try to get me to send him had ever worked and he sent me like an essay on how I was the worst person on the planet and something about how I thought I was better than him. Let’s just say I deleted Tinder that night.”
User “lostmysoultothedevil.” “I forgot my wallet while standing in line at the cafe. I ordered and realized my wallet missing so I said I’ll just zip out to my car and pay when I got back…I was parked right outside. This guy behind me says he’ll pay for my drink and I tried insisting I would pay but he pulled out cash and paid before I could really do anything.
I said Thank you and chatted while waiting for my drink. I was on my way somewhere so as I’m leaving he leaves too and asks if he can have my number. I was honest and said I was on my way to see my boyfriend. This guy just f*cking snaps, grabs my coffee, throws it across the street and tells me I’m leading him on and I’m a f*cking bitch and then he storms off.
I iust went to my car and got my wallet and bought my own coffee. The owner saw the whole thing and told me he’s now banned from the cafe. Apparently he’d done similar shit with other women and this was the last straw.”
User “PoorLama.” “He asked for my number after buying me a drink (didn’t know him or even noticed him till he walked up with a beer in hand). Said I was in a relationship (I was) and he started ranting and raving about how when ‘a nice guy buys you a drink, you give him the time of day’. I got up and started walking away, he threw the bottle of beer at me.”