Eminem lyrics make the world go round.
All Jay Whalley, a resident of Preston, UK, wanted to do was return a blazer to British retailer ASOS. But he knew he’d have to make his complaint stand out in some way. Retailers get tons of complaints from people like you and me every day––they just don’t get complaints from total bosses like Jay, who decided to rework the lyrics to Eminem’s “Stan” before submitting his complaint to the ASOS company Facebook page.
These are the original lyrics to the verse Mr. Whalley reworked, for your reference.
Dear Slim, I wrote you but you still ain’t calling
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got ’em
There probably was a problem at the post office or something
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot ’em
but anyways; fuck it, what’s been up? Man how’s your daughter?
My girlfriend’s pregnant, too, I’m bout to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what I’ma call her?
I’ma name her Bonnie
I read about your Uncle Ronnie, too, I’m sorry
I had a friend kill himself over some bitch who didn’t want him
I know you probably hear this everyday, but I’m your biggest fan
I even got the underground shit that you did with Skam
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I like the shit you did with Rawkus, too, that shit was phat
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Stan
People loved it.
Nicely done, ASOS. (Makes me want to buy blazers from them.)
But this isn’t the first––and it’s not likely to be the last––time Eminem’s music has brought customer service representatives and the public together in rap battle harmony.
Last fall, Jamie McLoin posted a picture of himself struggling with a packet of Woolworths Spaghetti. (The spaghetti won.)
His query to the Woolworths company Facebook page––in the form of reworked lyrics from Eminem’s “Lose Yourself––amassed more than 95,000 likes. (I remember this well, I nearly pissed myself laughing.)
Woolworths stepped up to the plate, combining lyrics from “Lose Yourself” and “Stan” in its response.
Do you think Eminem is amused?
Source: the-daily | H/T: Mashable, Huffington Post