Be Unique. Be Great.

Nine tips from secret agents to help you see right through people

The ability to¬†read others can be¬†an¬†effective way to¬†help you communicate with them. LaRae Quy, who worked as¬†an¬†FBI agent for 23¬†years, has this to¬†say on¬†the subject: “You don‚Äôt have to¬†be¬†a¬†first-class detective to¬†understand what is¬†going on¬†in¬†someone‚Äôs head. There are always signals that you can use. All you need to¬†know is¬†where to¬†look for them.”

So what exactly are the signs that can reveal what a person is thinking or feeling? Loopfy put together nine pieces of advice from LaRae that will help you see right through people.

1475350599-2387-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

There’s a whole range of physical behaviors that people engage in. For example, people might stare at the floor during a conversation, cross their arms, cough, scratch their heads, or rock back and forth on their feet.

People behave in¬†different ways for various reasons. Defining someone‚Äôs basic model of¬†behavior will help you understand their actions¬†‚ÄĒ are they doing something out of¬†habit, or¬†is¬†something you observe an¬†indication of¬†deceit, anger, or¬†immaturity?

1475350600-5594-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

Pay attention to the differences between an individual’s basic model of behavior and their words and gestures.

For example, have you noticed that someone has the habit of clearing their throat several times when they’re nervous? Could it be that they’re hiding something more behind this than might be obvious at first glance?

1475350600-1811-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

A single gesture or word doesn’t always have a hidden meaning. But when certaingestures follow one after another in a pattern, pay attention.

For example, someone might repeatedly cough, scratch their head, and shuffle their feet at the same time. In this case, you need to be careful.

1475350600-2739-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

If you notice that someone is acting somewhat out of the ordinary, pay closer attention to them. How does this person interact with others in the room? Does their facial expression change? What about their pose and their body language?

1475350600-7522-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

The mirror neurons located in the brain reflect the condition of our minds. For example, a smile activates muscles that are responsible for a happy facial expression. When we frown, we show our dissatisfaction.

When we¬†look at¬†someone we¬†like, we¬†give a¬†signal to¬†our facial muscles to¬†relax. If¬†that person‚Äôs face doesn‚Äôt “answer” you in¬†the same way, this person is¬†sending you a¬†message: either they don‚Äôt like you, or¬†they don‚Äôt like something you did.

1475350600-7381-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

The strongest person isn’t always the one who sits at the head of the table. A self-confident person, as a rule, has a strong voice (not to be confused with a loud voice).

Often, the leader of a group is a weak personality who to a large degree depends on others. Determine who in a group of people has the strongest voice, and your chances of success increase.

1475350601-5908-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

Often, people lack a fluidity to their movements. And if a person looks down at their feet rather than in front of them when walking, this is a sign of a lack of self-confidence.

If you notice this in a member of your team, offer this individual greater praise to strengthen their trust in you. Or pose direct questions to them in order to drag out of them what they’re too scared to say.

1475350601-3598-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

Action words (very often, verbs) give a better sense of how a person thinks.

For example, if¬†your boss says that he¬†‚Äúdecided to¬†work with company¬†X,‚Äú the action word here is¬†‚ÄĚdecide.” This one word indicates that, most likely, your boss¬†is: a) not impulsive, b) weighed up¬†different courses of¬†action, and¬†c) calculates several steps ahead.

1475350601-9956-650-1ccd54f71a-1-1475243087

Each of us has a unique personality, but there are basic questions that allow you to read a person at a fundamental level, whoever they are:

  • Is¬†this person an¬†introvert or¬†an¬†extrovert?
  • Are interactions with others a¬†starting point for their actions?
  • How does that person cope with risk and uncertainty?
  • What feeds their ego?
  • How do¬†they behave in¬†stressful situations?
  • What are they like when they‚Äôre relaxed?

Bear in mind that you need time to learn how to read people flawlessly. And, of course, there are exceptions to every rule. But by sticking to these principles, you can improve your skills of observation and raise your ability to understand people, in turn allowing you to communicate more effectively.

Source: brightside

Leave a Reply

Translate »