Thanks to the proliferation in online dating, meeting someone new isn’t hard. In fact, all it takes is one right swipe from your failing finger and before you know it you’re conversing over a candlelit dinner about why Grumpy Cat is the epitome of modern-day success.
However, no matter how good the first date was, the work has only just begun. After all, how do you prove that you weren’t just a one-date wonder? And that you can still hold a conversation after talking about everything under the sun? Admittedly, nothing in the dating world is guaranteed, but we at Lifehack Lane can help get you from A to B by listing 10 things every man and woman should do to assure the second date is just as memorable as the first.
1. Dress to impress
It almost goes without saying that the way we dress plays a significant factor in how others see us and that truism should be upheld on a second date too. Sure, you’ve already made a great first impression with a neat little number, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t make the effort again.
2. Plan to meet somewhere new and exciting
Going for drinks at a nice bar or grabbing a bite to eat are standard go-to first date options. Their safe and don’t require too much planning and provide an easy-going atmosphere.The second time around, however, and you should aim to shake things up. Because of social conventions, chivalry often dictates that this is the man’s responsibility, so step your game up, guys. Perhaps you could visit a cool underground skatepark? Or visit a gallery or catch a movie at an open-air cinema? Whatever it is, try and make it memorable.
3. Challenge them more
This point is crucial if you want to go one step further and truly test how compatible you are. Sure, speaking about political affiliations isn’t something one should usually do on a first date, but on the second meeting, you should get to know more about their view and beliefs. Opposites attract, sure. But more often that not, if you find little to debate about or conclude that the in-depth conversations are few and far between, then you may get bored. What’s more, your date- if they are the right fit for you- will find you more attractive and respect you for having opinions.
4. Don’t get too clingy
It’s easy to get caught up in the ecstasy that a perfect first date brings, and you could be tempted to text them or even call them on a more regular basis. But don’t. You’ve only known met them in person for a few hours. Patience is a virtue, and no matter how you view such conventions, coming across as needy or overzealous by the way you communicate can come across as intense and even scary.
5. Remember to be well-mannered
A first date requires ladies to be ladies and gentleman to be gentlemen? Not hard, right? One fart or misjudged burp, however, and more often than not your date won’t be impressed. With that in mind, the second time should be no different. As stated before, you’re still very new to one another, and just like with your boss at work, you should treat them with a degree of respect.
6. Don’t think too far ahead
Like with point 4, a good date can set expectations soaring and leave you imagining a life where you’re together. It’s a nice thought, and it’s good you’ve managed to think of nice things as opposed to the all-too-common axe-murderer scenarios, but you don’t want to jinx anything. Remain grounded and don’t expect the stars. That way, you’ll be even more wowed when they shine.
7. Make an effort to know more about them rather than speaking about yourself
People are different, and while some people talk more than others, whether that’s out of confidence or nerves, it can be quite overbearing and annoying for the other person. So listen and be inquisitive. You’ll find it may just work in your favour.
8 Mention something you enjoyed on the first date
If you’re on a second date, you probably got in well enough to not jump to conclusions and think you’re on the run from the cops. Either that or one of you was too nice to let the other know what a weirdo they were.
In all seriousness, it is always good to refer to a pleasant memory. Doing this can be a sweet way of letting someone know you fondly remembered a moment they enjoyed too. It could even be something silly, like reminding them when they laughed like a goofball at the oddly shaped table furnishings. Whatever it is, bring up a part of the date that you know will make them smile.
9. Complement them
Giving out too much on a first date is a risk many don’t cross. Sure, you can tell them they look nice, but it’s usually best to keep things less saccharine. On the second date, however, don’t be afraid to let the other know how beautiful they this time instead of only ‘looking good.’ Spruce up the adjectives, and let them know you find them desirable as well as cool. That way, you’ll know for certain whether they feel the same way from their reaction and how they choose to return the compliment.
10. Awkward silences and pauses shouldn’t be off-putting
Hollywood romances have long made us believe that the conversation must continually flow like some sought of river spreading life to even the most barren of lands. Sounds pretty lame right? And that’s because it is. No successful relationship involves someone talking every waking second. Instead, they’ve managed to find the beauty in comfortable silences- a paradox few appreciate. So don’t fret when the conversation stops for more than three seconds. Breathe deeply, smile and think of something else.